The most important relationship or priority in my life was my sister. We have been friends since 2015, alas we couldn’t hit the 10 year mark. Today, I have finally decided to let go of that friendship. What I am doing would make absolutely no sense to 22 year old me. But I think it’s time to move on..
I sent her this message..may be in time I will realise if it was right or wrong of me
I am not sure if I am doing the right thing or not. I am doing the best I can to really process what’s happening and why am I feeling like it’s the right thing to do.
But I think there is a huge difference in what we mean to each other or how we care or what matters to each other.
Like it’s so damn much. I am not able to understand you and you are not able to understand me too. We do not have that deep connection anymore. And I don’t think both of us wants to have that connection back.
I am not doing this to hurt you or make you feel bad. But I am doing this for me. I feel that I don’t deserve to be treated this way and I can’t stand being treated this way. I am in a state of sadness and I want to be happy too.
I am not sure if what I am doing will make me happy but I gotta try.
I do understand that you can’t comprehend what I am saying and you are thinking like why he doesn’t understand me. I think it’s because I have been not vocal enough or didn’t take a stand. I have been hoping that things better and it’s never better. I feel very much disrespected and the worse part is that you don’t realise that.
I haven’t had to beg for time and space with anyone else in my life this much and I realise that more you ask the less important you become.
I know you are fighting many battles and this is something that’s comes after a lot of things.
The only battle I have been fighting all these years was the trying to have you back as my sister for real. And I no longer have the energy to fight that battle.
You were best person, I had in my life.The person I was most happy and grateful for coming into my life. You were my biggest blessing.
I always want the best for you and I am not really the best for you now. I don’t even feel like it matters to you if I am or there or not.
I will always talk about you as the best thing that has ever happened to me and the person who had a profound impact on who I am today. I will care for the people in my life as how you used to care. I will stand up/speak up for things I believe in as how you stood up for things.
There are lot of things that I admire in you. If we go down this path then I feel, I will slowly forget all that and then replace it with the negative things.
I am sure you will proud of me in time. I am pretty sure you will be pretty fine without me and yeah so I am taking a break for me. I don’t expect you to fight for me. You have had good battles. I want you to take care of yourself always. Workout, eat well, sleep well and stay happy.
I will try not to forget the good memories.
I have not forgotten the promises I have made. But it’s the promise you have made and which I took to my heart which in turn broke mine. I don’t know if you remember but we have promised each that we will be there for each other, even if the other person is not even sane and till the last breath. Egane oke promise cheythitt.. sorry privacy undenkil can be there enoke parayumbola.. hypocrisy peak
Heyy….You can always count on me like 1,2,3… And it’s not okay…If you are not okay..
This was one of the simple promises. Anyways, I just wanna say you matter hell a lot to me and I want things to stay that way. But if things are going the way it currently is.. we will hate each other.
I don’t want that. I want the happy memories atleast.
Thats it 🙂